..dear reader..

Sent an email to therapist saying we wont be back. Impossible to get any further, too many forces pushed her away from seeing us at the times it matter most. Our coping mechanisms and the traumas they attempt to get us through are beyond her training and experience.  We told her about the pink jelly stuff with the dark line in it on the medical gauze and how it was Gabe early and during desperate life and death times and for whatever reason she fucked up and told us it wasn't true. Then we wanted to quit but abusers wouldnt let us. We told her about that to. She did some of us good to. It wasn't all damage. But when she denied that she was denying when her whole existence it wasn't just the memories we had to shove at back of a drawer, locked the drawer, roll the chest to the back of a cupboard, lock the house then run to another country it was but our whole identity, my whole self. She tried to tell us that is wasn't our whole identity but we were there for DID ther...

Hi Dad, We have started post with those two words a few times not sure if we managed more few words nevermind ever hitting 'publish'. Maybe there is heaps of them. Don't know. Not checking.. We have giving in to the waiting to be rescued. Its the end of term next week and we have gone the whole time paying almost £2 a day because we havent got it in us to to sort out the free school meals so all the steps to getting his passport renewed aren't happening.  Margo phoned and asked if we would go down this evening and watch a film, eat some snacks said she wanted some adult company so what the fuck she is asking us for I don't know. I'd like some adult company to. As therapist would say its not our job to meet her social needs so we said we would think about it but have no intention and made repeated V signs at the phone once it was over. Hash and a new old xbox game are our main crutches this now and will continue to lean on them heavily tonight. I have made...