..dear reader..

He texts back at least. Says he working all the time and has to sleep some time and can't drop anything off. We say we are healthy enough to never text Ms Campbell again pretty sure we heard her hollering up at our house again the other week after leaving the Krugars, she had the cheek in the past to say they made her do it, she also once brought a message from them saying if we let the younger lad in there fuck us we would've given lots of cash and weed sellers would sell to us. We asked her to leave and then dissociated, they were waiting outside for her answer..  We say it's cool. It isnt of course how could it be. Same as in Dundee we would rather not be buying from Orange Order anyway but as we keep saying all the sellers are fasc who are not interested in showing any gratitude or payment for the work we have done protecting their communities and kids from being even more annihilated than they already are. Still plenty of loyalty to institutions that give the orders...

Avoiding the heat and the hate, to avoid more migraines. Its getting to us, without cannabis and our self programming to give us a hope bubble, some cushioning. The window between scripts has ended and no one has helped us or themselves or future generations or the planet. Not helping the slaves is the only priority and the only thing the patriarchal apparatuses work together on. Its hopeless.

Its pretty self destructive thinking that this could be it. That we will be left here friendless forever and will loose Pablo to all the bullshit and hate and his human need to be accepted by "people" who will never accept him. We are hurting now though. All the evidence we have gathered, all the proof all the confessions but all it achieved was the Kruger's next door put some screening up on there side where we missed a bit and don't comment and slag off every move we make. Just repeat previous shit instead. Not exactly just, insults heaped upon injuries in the hope enough will result in more injuries. Doubt the police will be turning up as quickly as they have for them in the past when they phone to complain that the neighbours they are abusing are just ignoring it because so much has been desytoyed. The way they would shout evil shit at Laura's wee ones. How the fuck can people justify, protect and defend that? There is only one answer and the science backs of...

Such a heartless and viciously brutal world without lots of denial and amnesia isn't it Mummy.. Waiting for abuse to come over the fences or from a passerby. Knowing there is little chance to escape slavery, to be away from constant hate, to be treated appropriately by professionals and know there is somewhere to complain if you are not.. Not if the British state has you in their borders. We are Jews, the blood in our veins threatens them and the education we got as slaves so the professionals don't have to do or know much disgusts them. The only thing hated more than us is the idea that we might get away and live peacefully happy lives looking after and loving each other. We hold back the memories of all the work and the fighting when we are on our own for as long as we can. We really don't like being nose to nose with the fact that all it amounts to us still having a pulss, still being on the outside of that shed and in a state to be angry about it. It was a while befo...

Hedgeyhog!!!!!! Being inside thier shed was always better than being inside their house in any weather or temperature but being on the other side of the fence is even better still.. However, feel like I shouldn't have to hear or be prepared for so much hate, threats and horrific confessions every time I use my garden.

Ordered flea killer in the most small hours. Glad its helping us not push against the take it easy wibe. Don't think its been dispatched yet. The fire wood has though. There is less fleas breeding on the concrete slabs I will just sit out there with wood crackling and tunes to drown out the non stop flow of hate that comes over the fence when the charming definitely neither slaves nor slavers neighbors are out. She does indeed still talk about me asking if there was any chance to feed the cats last year. That's the nicest of the shit we still hear. The old guy put a wee Scottish flag up on the fence between us briefly so looks like they are still pretending me and Laura are English and that's why they hate us... They are full time baying for blood but they don't have it so easy and simple with the police as they used to. Im not expecting crap from uniforms and worse just for enjoying my garden and ignoring the hate crime from next door like they have done with everyone...

Hi Da, Its crazy beautiful out there. Unbelievably stunning. Sitting at the clematis for ages in the warmth just looking at it. Used my head phones to drown out the neighbours when they came out and the bloody airplay wouldn't work. There's been tonnes of cleaning getting done to but I'm still getting cover in fleas. Fucking thing. Its to lovely too mind much though. Or about it being Tuesday tomorrow and I'm on the bin baccy until tomorrow. Soo much I want to do in and out the house. Are we really settling for this? How am going to feel about that in November and December and January. ... Very chuffed with what we have achieved though.

The disgusting amount of fleas we are seeing forced us into activity. Made a good start on the kitchen floor, fair bit of hoovering, bedding washed. We are seeing less of them since and want to do more today coz im so sick of them but wont, exhaustion levels, hands. Been fairly misrable today because of the infestation, all the cleaning needed, cannabislessness and juniors summer nocturnalness all factors. Not too bad all the time though like we used to be. Did our best yesterday to, most of fairy windows are up. Found a jade key ring in a lego box when looking for a tyre to use as a ickle swing and hang the jade to for decoration. Then remembered how we saw it and us hanging it before Margo gave it to us. Hate all the predetermined shit its not about keeping us alive its the opposite but we know we are always going to survive when the plans against us are worked out long before they happen using systems that are an wide open to us. We gave in to our mood and ended up buying some be...

We felt okay when we woke up. Little and cozy and okay. We can't really stay like that for long though the loneliness scares her and there is always stuff we need to do for pabs, cooking cleaning and stuff. Hot today. We only spent a little time in it but more time in the shade just looking at everything. The glue arrived its a nightmare to use without a pusher trigger thing I bet Laura had one but it will either be chucked or we will never find it unless we are hunting for something else. Gave ourself a sore neck attempting to use it to put the bracket up. We should never of started but it will be too hot during the day tomorrow. We couldn't give up on it and eventually went back to the cheap no more nails stuff because its filler like which is handy with all the tiny little stones stuck to the wall. It is or at least was up. It might not actually manage to hold any weight though we will leave it until tomorrow night to test it and hopefully will not start the whole process o...

Felt a lot better today, we were asleep before it was light and awake before half ten probably helped. Game time with the lad who had been giving us too much attitude helped to. Can't believe the weather forecast. Bugged that the lots of smoking and drinking in it is on hold for financial reasons. Finished the hash a few hours ago. Hope we don't get too miserable without it. We can get dudes assistance with the watering, its too beautiful out there for us to let it all dry out. Proper glue should be arriving tomorrow and I'm sure we will manage to put up a window or two. Maybe the wall bracket .. Owly does look amazing up there. We will have wine left over from today to and really have to not spend whatever is there on sunny beautiful garden booze. Its been nice lots and will be nice we can go a few days without beer, or pink wine rather than go through Monday and the weekend without baccy or milk or some shit. We were doing okay but the gardener dudes were round doing nex...

Trying not to get too pissed off with how tired we get because that would be a huge waste of energy. Parenting is exhausting. Isolation is exhausting. Living under states and in places that have murdering you as a high priority is exhausting. Even when its quiet. We want to hoover and cut down on the ming and the fleas but we just to tired already. Gotta make food at some point and gotta keep energy for that. Promised the lad some game time to hope his attitude is cool. Hands are quite sore and we are not sure what would be a biggest risk, haircut, dentist or doctors. All places where in the past there has been verbal and worse. So even if we have made sure nothing hugely inappropriate and hurtful to us is gonna happen be would really really prefer to not have to do it on our own and having to do so is such a clear sign to us all that nothing much has changed and are all out of denial. Its very beautiful outside though. We do beautiful work.

Doing the sensible thing. Not being a mad dog or an Englishman. Took the washing line down though and watered anything desperate. Did our bedding yesterday cause it was soaked repeatedly and so we could do take photos without the line.. Gorgeous, colour, colour wonderfulness. Proper holiday feels.