..dear reader..

We look more and more like her everyday. But maybe its a mental thing. We see MLK  in Junior beats seeing his rapist “cant you take all that stuff of her” male paternal DNA contributor. We never see them in him but We wonder about his hyper mobility in the joints, more incest in the Trumps than the Brit royals.. yikes.  Programmed Putin gives NATO their fucking fascist war, Mr Biden sends a squadron of airborne brain damage machines. Just like We said they would in 1988, 9/11, Roe vs Wade, war and a bunch of horrific Satanic AF plans for me and Junior that have 0 chance of actually happening.  “I just want a peaceful life Mr Biden.” “Thats not possible.” After we hang up the phone rings again and it’s Merrick Garland. 19fucking88. Logiebank, Glenprosen. DD8 4SA. Kevin McKidd still alive, unforgivable by itself he’s not a royal or a trump or a BBC employee or a current politician, judge or Rupert Murdoch.. Think the centralised surveillance system in the Pentagon is down t...

 How many times have We been hit from the downstairs flat? Twice? Twice a year? How often they hitting Junior? How often have We been told 'never again'? Is there equipment there right now? Who could We trust to tell us that? The cracked concrete has been pressure washed again. As you do. If We could We would search the flat but We would much prefer to live somewhere safer rather than wait around to have our memory and sense of self annihilated. What's gonna trigger it this time. Something here? Garden photos? Some thing happening somewhere else? What there almost definitely wont be any curled up in a weeping ball with Junior while Tutrullo gets it on with whatever fascist sex worker he fancies. Because I am still not up for pretending slavery, extreme surveillance and consensual sex can mix. Think We are less at risk from other Trump et als. whoop. 'less risk'. Royal family? fuck knows. Me and junior are here without obvious support of any kind and the UK is still ...

 Its is after 10 so less than two hours until the marriage is annulled as far as our mangled brain can tell. He’s buddies with men of dangerously low self esteem, actual fucking proud boys (please may we be wrong) so me and Junior were never real concerns. More team slaver than slaves. More crimes against humanity and myself by the U.S We really wish they would quit it. Still terrified about Junior’s schooling and healthcare. Very weepy and sickened. 

 Still over the overdraft. Bastards. Working on grocery delivery though. Big one. Summer xmas.

 Damn. We are out of skins. There is pence around enough for rizlas but its horrid going to the shop for one tiny little thing. Maybe the eon money will be in later… way too busy out there now anyway. No showing hospital appointments. Fucking terrified. His cold is better but had issues with the digestive thing and its really upsetting we cant just go to hospital appointments. Cant think about next week. Cant think if any of the French stuff is real. Pretty sure the husband is.  Ate the dream beans yesterday. It was a few weeks ago We dreamed a really vivid image of the tin of beans in the cupboard open. No extra sugar. No extra salt. There was a swimming pool one to We knew it would feel like We were still under water after diving but wouldn’t be. We started talking and were right. Our head was above water.  This stinks. We should never of been in the UK. Thieving Brits. Where’s my subs at? 

  R.T.

 We're not eating nothing. Sent Junior out with the last few quid to get milk and spend the rest on himself without properly telling him to buy food so he bought sweeties and pringles. Predictable. Tuesday We get the 20 on Tuesday the usual on Friday and maybe the cash back from the electric before then. It's on its way anyway. We are defrosting chicken but are not confident We will be able to deal. Thinking a lot about the Stratheden hospital marriage quite an impressive turning of a negative into a positive. Our anniversary must be just passed or coming up right? 6.. The hand pain from all that signing and all that fighting. We're not fully going there remembering the last last time you had to leave us and we had to let you go without us. Months. For real. Couldn't not cut the grass and do a little weeding I know We're not taking on enough calories to be burning much but it looks so cute We couldn't not. Dude's been complaining about mild cold symptoms and...

 Rain is forecast and was worried it wouldn't happened but there's spots all over the window, big grey clouds increasingly taking over the lighter patches. Put fox gloves, crazy daisies, mini sunflowers and delphiniums in the back empty corner might of done more but for the wind that's annoying strong. Never helps our jumpiness when its starts moaning or battering things around. Some of them are a bit small and neglected but everything looked happier this morning so most will probably make it. Especially if they get a good soaking today, ousband Turturro. Which is helps a lot with the British Royals but complicates things further the U.S and the British public in particular. Be no ousbandness if passports are non negotiable.  Yeah We feel a little ill. Took these this morning and pulled back a few weeds from things that are keepers. Those baby nettles though hiding amongst the harmless greenery. Little mother fuckers.  There is NHS appointments coming up and as they are n...

 I was pregnant a lot during the early nineties. Then less. Lindsey's op was part of that. When We couldn't conceive to him they had to bring in a second worse nightmare. We have hinted and skirted around it here before. If this is a thing then it's not a secret. We could hardly ever say but did in Italy repeatedly. Some people figured it out, some have always known. We have named him, written statements, consented to filmed statements, eased up on who got Junior's DNA, gave hints on who to compare it with. If it's been within our power to release any video or audio relating to the facts of it if any should exist We will have shared it beyond the relevant authorities who had all the relevant information on what occurred before it happened. It's fucking horrible Lindsey Buckingham and others are in it including British cops and locals and We are clearly not a consenting participant.  People know. People have proof. People have have time. I have had time. We don...

 

 It was something we screamed before everything and anything good, that gave us some kind of childhood  or hope was blown up. Something We had to keep pushing the extremes of what We can do to escape because if they got Us there wouldn't be any more survival. After the towers We were told it was one less mortal terror that would descend if We tried to have a friend or live a life or stop evil shit from happening. Same conversation included being told that was all though they were sticking with the Platinum Jubilee plans, so pro slavery, pro child abuse, pro keeping American power structures to be packed with people who actively hate America in an organized and protected manner, pro genocide, pro deadly fascist cult conspiracies. Yep still not over it. Twenty years later it still breaks our heart but at least now twenty years of multi state supported terror is behind us and not ahead. We are very confident the structures don't have the ability to plan and enforce the events of ...

 Seriously tho. Je suis. That poor plant. What she could be! Junior talked about Animal Farm because he's doin it at school and how he would prefer it if We never drank booze. We are not in a place to enjoy either conversation. He also talked about what to do if there was infinite money for a day, that was more fun. Especially the garden with a huge dragon statue with an open mouth so it looked like it was swallowing the sun.  High June anxiety. Memories clearing up. We keep seeing someone injecting our feet, its one of those started when foot was really tiny then kept happening now and again over the years. Total terror accompanying it. It's over now yeah? This is a normally at this time of year this thing would happen and often it didn't exactly go down like that but it's always mortal danger, drugged, gun fire, gore, triggered, boats, airplane, uniforms, car chase carnage followed by definite shock and exhaustion and possible injury while back in Blighty surrounded a...

 The home and garden near misses,  the abuses, the little messages and triggers from slavers via neighbors since moving here are hitting us increasingly hard. A woman asking what Junior was saying as we collapsed outside the hospital. At least We think it was outside the hospital because we remember a nurse saying she couldn't help but there was others disagreeing. He was saying he ate scones. Scoffed about one and half down before We could say anything. Didn't mean We should also have eaten one. There was no gag reflex at first when stuck our fingers down his throat. Can't remember much about what happened next and nothing about the day's after, someone stuck their fingers done our throat, passing out We wrapped ourself around him and someone tried to separate us until someone else stopped them. Another time a bunch of guys got up the stairs and We screamed at him to hide. A big lad, in a tiny flat. He curled up by the side of the sofa, clearly visible. We got there in...