February 03, 2015


Ok we have covered, all be it briefly being tortured by being raped after objects had been inserted orifice/s, with the aim of pushing the object/s further and further in to cause maximum pain, difficulty in getting it out alone, they wouldnt help until they got what they wanted or gave up. These practices where also linked to forcing open the cervix and causing abortions.  Various stages of pregnancy, saw it happen to others to. Sometimes lots.

The pain we are in, thats what it is. Its all been unravelling into a straight line of agonies and horrors.  Feeling it pretty much constantly over past few days, those moments when they eventually broke through and the fluids ran. So many times. Often planned as part of the cultist rings but sometimes just to punish or end a pregnancy from local rapists and gangs or the bigger international traffickers.

Little mes, youve met some of them they just want to love and be around nice and pretty things. All bonded and big with a baby not a little thing. And they do that.

At school.  At home. the radio  DJs, family members. All the crying and pain and the faces of the people that did it is coming back. We don't know yet. How many. What with the way they could control the amnesia by using such techniches to force parts of our DID system control other parts. They could trigger flashbacks and set things up to look likw whatever it was had just happened, other techniches to so you had no idea what was going on where you ever where half the time.

I guess we are still trying to hold on to them. Our babies. We can feel the pain react when we think and type that. We always 'knew' what happened to we knew we had been raped, was a victim of an abusive family, had been trafficked by rings that used rituals, forced abortions and other extreme violence to get what they wanted. We always knew we were a victim of pornography because the TV and films bombarded me with triggers. But know I feel it to and memories are not disapearing as we switch. What are we supposed to do with this flesh and this brain after 20 something years of that.