Just like mother..

She was always amazing and to be in an environment where we could just be and not hide what we were about was always so brilliant. She was just as bad. What a history. You won't be reading about it in a weekend supplement with a national newspaper any time soon unfortunately. Fighting more or less blind. We had so much tell each other. We were falling clues left by predecessors without any illusions about what happens to folk like us. So many kept locked up, squished and enslaved decade after decade. British authorities attitudes to intelligent sensitive people hasn't changed much in last few centuries, kill it or split it. She asked to track down one of the girls we still see everywhere. Scratched codes in attics and other places, there faces in mirrors behind us. Shouting 'Viva la revolution' in their Edwardian pinafores with double all the power and purpose of any of the French blokes that came before them. Women see their futures taken from them every time there is almost massive social change. We know we are betrayed and the misogyny from high and low alike will turn our sons into our most feared abusers so we do whatever we can to hand down whatever we can to the unborn enlightened in the hope that they will have a chance.  She said she could get us out of Scotland if we found her. They pimp our minds long long after our bodies aren't much value to them.

Still bloody waiting mum and my zombie 'sister' is still the fascist puppet on the throne surrounded by rapists of all kinds.

He who controls the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world. So much promise ruined. So much science held back. All these lies lived in terror, hunger and pain as the truth and dignity we are all entitled to is kept back so a bunch of vicious gangsters and their industries can maintain their false authority.

Separate the boys and the girls then manipulate, program, train, brainwash and torture them in different ways so we never have each others backs or can truly fight side by side again. Ritual Abuse, state sponsored mass human rights violations and all the programming in Britain did not begin in the 1980s.  They have been breeding people, slaughtering people, torturing babies and experimenting with turning people into robots for much longer than that. They did ramp up the scale and modernise it then though.

I miss my family. I worry about Andy I know he will be worried about us. I miss talking without having to bullshit or dissociate with Beatie and everyone. Miss bloody useless Will and I'm not all that sure about you H. Miss big ears of course and my Papa, who gave us a most wonderful education and some lovely troops.

Trying not to get depressed at thought of being stuck here next year. Survive a day at a time and our energy levels have been a bit better. Still though. Where the fuck is my brain and know we are terrified and trained to never actually be who we are here but come on, how the fuck are we going to get away with a mind like this?

As always we focus on the negative and not the positive..  

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