April 30, 2010
I do really enjoy it but there is so much of the slacker in me.
Poetry is enjoyable and therapeutic enough for me to stick at instead of abandoning when the going starts getting rough. It is a lovely medium for me to try and deal with some the commitment issues gracefully pointed out to me by a therapist. I thought it was a bit unfair I was only 13 and thought it pretty normal that I had commitment and personal space issues. I was proud of them they were only normal things about me.
Still the problems with the physical details, the feeling that I'm betraying other people or worse my self by showing real blood, guts and cellulity thighs. But that's what poetry is and that's where the real closure is. So I can't patter a poem out in a few hours, big deal I've only started.
The english needs work though, it has to be conscious and intentional. I have to know what I'm doing to learn how to stop.
Collecting for dark matter, first pathetic frustrating attempt at the report for 5, it is a report rather than a commentary and that can only be a good thing. Researching the right magazine for our work, local and lesbian to begin with, keeping an eye on the nationals and bigger competitions. Thinking about prose.
Maybe some parenting and housework should be fitted in their somewhere....he has giggled and sang in his sleep every night for a week now he can't be that traumatised by his indulging in angsty but optimistic poems and extreme physical discomfort.