So if there was a huge evil American supercomputer.
The only 'The Towers' we wanted, needed and have been involved in plans to harm and/or destroy. If it did exist but no longer became so how would we manage this without formal confirmation? Well We are going to know aren't we? At least partly. The very real deaths from above would theoretically protected it. In would maybe be in our mind as the reason locals always know so much so quickly and were kept ready to do any horrific shit any time. So maybe that would mean the main thing that keeps life so awful for us in the UK is no longer a thing. Yeah We would probably be too anxious and triggered and programmed to want to write about it or have any real confidence in any of it. Yeah it will be after our Mom has died and We wont have to keep ourself nuts to stop ourself remembering who she is and what's happening to her. And yeah we will have remembered We have a Home. And land. And drilling rights.
No not any teeny tiny bit of Us thinks my mum decided she was going to leave me and Junior as we are after she's gone. Leave us to fate, others. She tried that before and now I'm always going to be partly feral. And yeah all the cults and the pre determinism and death rights. Do I think I would of helped her with that yes. Lots since I dunno sometime before birth and whatever other help we needed with it from everything and everyone ever.
While she was alive We could only wake up so much before remembering how and when she was going to die and know we would get so little time together. Even when I found a way to stop myself s we would be intentionally and brutally reminded soon enough. A lot of the same systems that kept us down in Scotland, that keep us down here. Instant horrible violent depraved humanoids in the place you are trying to pretend is home. Knowing every time your moved you have start again with beating them back. Back to the of the door at least. It wasn't until we talked about this huge evil supercompter or it's equivalent that she's got while this has always plagued us. We were counting through all the stuff that will be over soon after she is and she forgot about the tooth and we laughed and cried about that. It's they do love me that makes it's a fucking problem. They were literary dragged out shouting they would be back as they were knocked out but now too much time has passed and too much shit has happened for them to be able to do that. It sucks.
It's the feral, bad times cold, hunger, pain and stuff from when very little. We have been telling ourself it's going to feel better for a long time now. She was always very clear to us and worked hard to keep her stuff separate from the crown when they were always pushing her to hand it all over. She would hold on to stuff much longer than I would. I always knew that handing it over to them was often a really good way of getting rid of it. They would literally burn through it and then there would be nothing left to fight about. She came round when I should her ways to encourage them to burn through all the faster in ways that were unharmful to anyone but themselves. Lots of training opportunities for the kids. No chance of it getting out of hand.
No surveillance and punishment machine in the states. Yeah they would prefer we not say that if it were true. There will be all kinds of plans if it is true and it still takes us back to waiting. Alone. With a teenage male mini male I'm utterly terrified for and of. And they still have lots of smaller ones watching always. With all those crazy past achievements we are barred from seeing any record us. Except this. Not quite the same though.
