June 04, 2016

Marco. Polo.

Kind of spoiled the romance and passion at bit didnt it. Stumbling through the woods using the game you used as children to fall in each other's arms and make love and then she is in incredible agony because she has DID and forgot she had been hurt bad recently and his mates didnt want to tell him because it would upset him..

Your on your way yeah? Your English will be even better than it was a year ago. They are very serious. We were in their care when we were lost to the worst and the breeding for years. They were and are no more happy about that than we are. They forget nothing. They treat as really well so we havent been fucking with their computer systems for the last 2 decades like we have everywhere else with the possible exception of Palestine who have nothing worth fucking with any way. (Dude would really love you help you out here but I suspect if I did I would be as well bulldoze your family homes my fucking self)

We remembered being up on the roof with a few of our wumin getting ready when one of our "Charlie's" pops his head up and asks if he can join. We were all, both internally and externally quite happy. We all had proper sniper's rifles but he didnt his was a hunting rifle. So we swapped for a whole bunch of obvious reasons. "You'll be Rose then" he might of said when it was ongoing and we weren't hearing very much. They were serous long term traffickers and abusers getting all set up for a big day time rape show. We waited until everyone was in place and it was about to start, then started firing together on three.. People who been doing that shit for years and who brought kids up to carry on the same traditions, same industries, loyalty to the same slavers. Not any more.

Well you know. The worst bit was when one of our wumin was running around down there for some fucking reason instead of being tucked up under a table as discussed.. She did have her reasons. We weren't entirely convinced. It looked like she was just having a laugh at the time so we shot near her feat and she squealed and hid under a table after that. We were are laughing. Desperately at times looking for the this is serious, tragic traumatic events but could get there. What they were doing and had been doing and had no intentions of stopping and were so supported. It just feels so right.

We told you didn't we? About overhearing a familiar couple when we first arrived. He lit and cigarette and we could tell by her tone and body language she was berating him for it and he said it didnt matter they were all going to die. We couldnt make out much of the next exchange between them but we were looking straight at her to see the colour drain when she checked to see who on earth her husband could possibly be taking about.

They might of been in the cheating bastard caravan who had gone by each other and their own hands by the time we got their all relied up.

We still have the daydreams about that site or a site like it and taking out the horrible caravans and replacing them with yurts and those type of things. Look so pretty under the birches. Scotland is actually having a go a having a summer and it's just upsetting us. It's not Italy.

 Our bench with the rose pattern has arrived (as has the micro stand with the sun flowers) but we arnt up for assembling and sorting out the areas where they have to go. We just scurry back to bed lots but we are watering the flowers and seedlings even if we aren't washing the dishes. Mould can be binned. Flowers can't be resurrected. If you aren't here to see them yourself when more are in bloom we will post some pics. Chelsea Flower Show it isn't but we are quite proud to have made something pretty while we have been going through such ridiculous awfulness.

We drew a map didnt we? Of what our social situation would be and is. 16 = :-D, 17 = :-), 18 = :-/

It's not like we don't trust. We totally do and it is much easier now we can remember a bit about people. But that abandoned, lost child in a very dangerous place feeling doesn't shift we just get better at knowing that is what we are feeling and knowing people felt the same at losing us and our kids have and are all going through the same or similar. Doesn't hurt any less. Good to feel more of us though always and remember where we are really from of course.

We bought a thumb support. Possibly wouldn't of if it had been clearly prized. The right isnt so bad but the left has been bothering us and really easy to wind up. We do find them comforting though. Daft I know but we associate them with being cared for and rescued, accepted and nurtured.

Solo sempre.

Loco molto.

Forze. Forze. Forze.