June 13, 2018

Huge bud has finally opened. Smells kinda subtle but lovely.  Its raining now and we are so glad. We need to not keep over doing it. Its hard balance though between the exhaustion onntop of depletion of existing here and doing enough to stay comfortable, clean and happy as possible. We think we are a little better at pacing ourself. Glad something else is taking care of giving it all a good watering. Supposed to be rain then sun tomorrow. Perfect for balancing rest and improving shit. Its just not fucking fair that I am my thirties or there about and am ruined after a bit of gardening and cleaning a window. Slavery, running from and war against slavery don't exactly given you a childhood where you are allowed or are able to rest.

Love you Daddy. Beautiful isn't it? So glad we don't have to say everything that would bhurt us because you know. Its not like we hate because we are told to. We just have it in our head so much now that wherever we go we will get flashbacks of piles of murdered people and the sick torture games that were played. But we have been places with you haven't  we where we weren't reminded of all the worst and we could think and feel again.