July 28, 2016

his needs

News isnt bad Stina. The social work review went well. Social worker's boss is a very different animal than social worker. She told us our rights in much clearer terms and told social worker he had no grounds for court orders to keep junior in care once I get discharged. Cause of the weekend pass we were able to think and write and sent out an email saying all the stuff the ward and psychiatry kept us too stressed and dissociated to say and because we had written it we were much more able to speak in the meeting. He's not an easy guy to like is the social worker, maybe he thinks thats him being professional. Doesnt make much sense to us. Surely its within a child's best interests for there to be rapour between yourself and the child's parent. Instead of being so consistently icy cold. He tried it on again during the visit today saying he had spoken to a child psychiatrist who agrees with him that Pablo should stay in care while my parenting is assessed but there would be more visits..

So basically, a child who has lost so many relationships, has been moved around lots should stay in care while being assessed by an NHS child psychiatrist who hasnt met Pabs or myself and who only knows what they were told by a child social worker who has the people skills of a week old tuna sandwich and who refused to give me written information on my rights and gave me one hour of access in a month..

Seeing as I'm not mental and have been told my rights and do have the kid's best interests at heart we declined.. Fucking ridiculous suggestion. It would be horrific for Pabs. He would resent me, the docs, the carers, everyone even more than he already does. He needs to come home. They can visit as much as they like but there is no way we can agree to him living somewhere else because someone with no idea thinks the perfect storm of triggers and deaths causes another breakdown in us.

We wont know more about when I get discharged for a day or two yet. When they will probably try and get us to disclose again in ways that anyone who knows anything about brains and traumas would tell them is just causing more harm. We tried weeks ago to tell them not to as they arnt going to believe it anyway but they kept doing it and pushed back our recovery.

No point in being scared although it's perfectly reasonable response.


1 comment:

  1. Good to hear that Daffs! Reading your posts I understand the fear, but I also see you being brave as hell and figthing for you and Pabs no matter what. I can only imagine how triggering and sad and horrible this must have been for you and I guess you will need time to process this new shitty experience. I so hope you get Pabs back soon, he needs to be with you and not in the hands of a social worker that honestly need to find a new job...
    You can do this. You got this. Youre brill.
    Lots of love and support and safe comforting hugs for anyone who wants
    Stina

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